................ wooooo-sahhhhhh ................
Sooo... if I'm minding my own business... watching the "Bad Girls Club" and strumming my six-string, why oh why are you bothering me? Please explain how, when it's been at LEAST 6 months since I heard your voice, and a year and a half since I saw your face... you're still haunting me?
I'd ask you to leave... let me live my life... allow me to invite in even the prospect of submitting a portion of myself to someone else on the same level as you were afforded... I'd beg of you to let me reclaim that small piece of my heart that you'd stolen... no wait... I'd freely given in lighter times.... I'd request these things...
... except...
What would would I have?
... I can't smell you anymore... can't even remember your essence wafting lightly into my experience... your features are becoming vague, except for the technological 'gifts' that allow for my sadistic-voyeurism to flourish... But you look different... something changes when you're holding your son... or touching her... shoulder... something about that picture is wrong... strange...
... it's not you... it's her...
..............she.......................
...... should have been......
.............me..........................
... but it's not crippling anymore... these memories... thoughts... regrets.... matter of fact, you've become more fleeting than concrete... I go about time... being Jae... learning Jae... seeking Jae... forgetting J.
I'd ask you to leave... let me live my life... allow me to invite in even the prospect of submitting a portion of myself to someone else on the same level as you were afforded... I'd beg of you to let me reclaim that small piece of my heart that you'd stolen... no wait... I'd freely given in lighter times.... I'd request these things...
... except...
What would would I have?
... I can't smell you anymore... can't even remember your essence wafting lightly into my experience... your features are becoming vague, except for the technological 'gifts' that allow for my sadistic-voyeurism to flourish... But you look different... something changes when you're holding your son... or touching her... shoulder... something about that picture is wrong... strange...
... it's not you... it's her...
..............she.......................
...... should have been......
.............me..........................
... but it's not crippling anymore... these memories... thoughts... regrets.... matter of fact, you've become more fleeting than concrete... I go about time... being Jae... learning Jae... seeking Jae... forgetting J.
... release me...
2 comments:
ahhhhhhhh. ugh! i can relate.
Never been here but I know someone who has...*hugs*
Sincerely,
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